How I wished…

“What do you love about me?”

“I love everything about you; your eyes, your nose but most importantly, your smile and love for me.”

“But... I do not know what I love about you. Let’s just break up.”

Yes, I was heartless. That was a conversation of my boyfriend and me when I was younger. I do not care about others’ feelings until I met you. You have changed everything about me, every single one. How I wished I have never know you. But I can’t.

___

One day, I received a text message on my phone.

-Hey! Hello JunSu!- I was quite taken back by this anonymous person that sent a message to my number. Maybe that person got the wrong number.

-I’m sorry, but do I know you?-I replied and continue what I was doing earlier. Before I could proceed doing anything, I felt a vibration from my phone. I took it closer to my face and the text message read:

-Maybe you have seen me in school before. :) :) - I wondered who this person was. So we carried on to text one another regarding your identity.

-Can’t you just tell me your name already? Lol.- I texted you back because I couldn’t wait any longer to know who I am texting with the whole night. I do not like the feeling of being unknown.

-I’m YooChun, your senior. Ring a bell?- Actually nothing came into my mind when you mentioned your name. I put down my pen and started thinking who this person was. Still, no bells were ringing.

-Not really. Did I actually meet you before? Hah.-

I tried thinking who you were. I felt bad for not remembering you at all.

-We met during the team camp, remember?-

-Still no bells ringing. Throw in more clues. Haha.-

-Remember the section where you are supposed to pick out straws from a pool of flour?-

Okay I think I heard silent bells ringing. I think I recalled someone who played flour with me after the game station was concluded. With the leftover flour, someone threw a handful worth of flour towards me. Being a slowpoke, I reacted slowly and got hit by the snow-liked flour on my hair and face. Seeking revenge, I grabbed a handful worth of flour and launched forward to return the attack. But I was stopped by my team leader because we are supposed to head off to another game station. Maybe you were the one.

-Are you the one who attacked me with flour?!-

-Yes I was the one. Finally you remembered who I was!! I’m delighted!- I smiled at the text message. I can picture you with a happy smile plastered across your face.

I remembered this is how we first talk to each other over a communication channel. I was actually excited to meet you in person because you protracted to me a friendly and warm image. I knew I had to meet you. How I wish we could talk this like, again.

___

Ever since then, we have been hanging out a lot during school time and after school. A lot of our school mates were getting suspicious of our relationship. But I do not care what they are saying about us. I am comfortable as who we are now, brothers.

I was visiting my grandmother off the outskirt of Seoul when we were texting each other, as usual. Just then, I received a message which content is something that I would never expect, although it was something that came across my mind.

-Will you, Kim JunSu, willing to be my partner? -

I was goofing around with my cousins when I received your text. I didn’t give a serious thought about it since I was in a happy-go-lucky mood. I immediately replied a yes even though I wasn’t sure what was I signing on.

-Sure! Why not?! Hahaha-

That was how we started our relationship as lovers. How I wished this moment had never happen.

___

Since I have met you, my character changed. I became more extrovert and outgoing. You have opened my world to a totally new dimension. I was glad you came into my life. However, life is full of sudden events.

Dear Junsu,

You know I have strict parents. Now I am like a strapped bird in a cage. I can’t go out of my house because the main exams are coming and my parents are very worried about my declining grades. Since it’s my last year of school, it is really important to me. They’ve even confiscated my phone from me. That is why I wrote a letter to you. I want you to know that I will always love you like now, forever and ever. Remember this okay! My dearest dolphin! Do not miss me too much okay? Once the exam is over, I promise you can have the whole of me! Meanwhile, please study hard for your exams too.

Love,

Yoochun

I read the letter and put it aside, into my mini safe box. I continued to study but my mind was filled with you, and only you. Since then, you wrote me umpteen copies of letter that my mini safe box was exploding with them. But one day, I received a letter that I would never want to receive.

Dear love,

I am so sorry for not spending any time with you. You know how sad I am right? I am so sorry. The studies are tedious for me. I cannot manage both sides well; you and studies. I have to forgo one so that I can concentrate on one. I am so sorry dear. I have to study hard so as not to disappoint my parents. You have no idea how stress I have been these days thinking about you and my studies. I cannot take it anymore, dear. Sigh. I know you hate me now for doing this, but I have no choice. I am so sorry. Please forgive me. Let’s just break up.

Apologies,

Your YooChun

I have no idea tears were already streaming down my cheeks as I read this in my room. I wanted to salvage this relationship, but I couldn’t, because your studies are at stake, meaning your future. I do not want your future to be diminished because of my selfish act. I believe that our love will last, because you promise me that you will spend time with me after the exams, after all, I am the only person you loved in this world, right? How I wished this was the truth.

The time without you was hard to manage. I was lethargic for most of the time because I couldn’t get over the fact that we had broke up already. I thought out mighty love would conquer all difficulties but I was wrong. I decided to do something after your exams were over. I was hoping that everything would revert back to what we use to have, but how wrong I was.

___

I came by your house the day after your papers ended. I was holding on to your favourite chocolates and a letter that was hand-written by me. You wouldn’t know how much tears will spill in the process of writing it, but I was elated that your papers were finally over and we can start anew again. After sometime, I saw a silhouette wearing a school uniform walking towards my direction. I smiled from ear to ear as I waited patiently for your presence to be in front of me. I waited so long to be able to see you, I longed for you warm from your hugs and your kisses. I missed every part of you so badly that a single tear escaped my eye. I brushed it off because all my suffering would end soon, after a minute, or so I thought. I can see that your footsteps got heavier when you were approaching your apartment, I thought you delighted to see me, but how wrong was I.

“Dear!” I jumped over to give you a tight hug. But you didn’t return the hug because I wouldn’t feel the warm from you. The warm you use to shower me with, the warm that I have longed for, the warm that I realize was lost the moment when I hugged you. I knew something was off but I brushed the thought off because I knew there was a happy reunion waiting for you, me; us.

“Here! I’ve got you chocolates and a hand written letter!” I handed over the items to you. You extended your arms forward slowly; I can tell that you were reluctant to receive my presents. I do not want to question you why. I do not want us to quarrel over minor issues like this because I am awaiting the long waited reunion and that it is going to happen soon.

“Are you happy that I came by my dear?” I asked him. I realize that ever since we’ve met, you haven’t said a word. I wondered why but I kept my silent.

“JunSu… why are you here? I thought you were busy.” You sounded low and unconcern.

“You are more important of course. I missed you so much!” I tried to sound as happy as I can be because I knew something was amiss. I wanted my chirpy mood to destroy the unhappiness within you.

“I... missed you… too. But…but things are different now.”

“How are things different?” I looked into your eyes. I want to know why this is happening, because what I feared is happening.

“We broke up, JunSu. You shouldn’t have come here.”

“But I thought you said I am your only love?! You promised me that you will spend time with me after your exams ended?!” I end off my sentence in a demanding tone. I wanted to know why. *plays KYHD*

“Look Junsu.” You grab hold of both my arms and looked straight into my eyes. “We are done and over with.” Someone please slap me. I need to be awake of this horrible and terrifying dream of reality; this harsh and cruel truth.

“But… why…” before I couldn’t even finish my sentence, you took off into your apartments, leaving me stranded on the lonely pathway. As I watch your back leaving me, I felt the cold and hard fact hit on me, the fact that you are leaving me. It wasn’t an easy task. I bit my lips as I wanted to launch forward and grab hold of the love we share, the love we used to share. But it was all gone; disappeared into thin air. But a part of me is holding back, because I love you too much, I am letting you go, letting all of it go. YooChun, can you hear my heart calling out for you. No, I know you can’t because you abandoned me. I am crying, so is my heart. But at the same time, it is bleeding. I could feel my internal organs bursting over of my already lost-control body. I wanted to explode, but I know this is not the right place. I took the last look of your apartments, because I know if I walk out of here, I will never ever going to come back to this place, where it is filled of sorrow. I feel an imaginary stab at my heart when I realize you were long gone, you did not even look back at me, not even a slightness bit. I finally accepted the truth, you left me. I dragged my feet off the pathway and walked aimlessly around your neighbourhood. I wanted to hide and pour my tears out. I want to remove my heart so that it would not hurt so badly, so bad that it would suffocate me if I am hurt any further.

After that meeting, we did not meet again. My heart and mind just died. I could not think and eat properly. I cried to sleep every night, reading your letter over and over again. I know what I am doing can’t bring you back to my side, but I just want to recall my memories with you. I am doing what I can to heal my heartbreak but nothing is healing my wound. Not even a sorry from you can heal the wound. It permanently left a scar that naked eye can’t see, but what a broken heart can feel. I had a thousand WHYs to ask you, but i bottled it down within myself. Because I that even when I have the answers, you will not be here anymore.

All beautiful moments have an end, so does ours.

The beautiful memories that we have shared, are stored in my safe-lock mind. What can lock it will be the key of sadness.

___

Dear YooChun,

We have been dating for 2 years now. The time we spent together was great. I have always been thankful to God for sending an angel like you down to earth instead of making you stay by his side. You were so kind and gentle towards me, making me fall deeper and deeper each day without fail. I was so thankful. I knew you loved me too, just like how I loved you. And I know you loved me more than I do. My mum often said it’s always better to find someone who loves you more than you do. I’m thankful for that as well. How i wish...

Loving you always,

Junsu

Discover (2/2)

Jae stay put on his feet after Yunho closed the door. He stood there in this thinking position; rested his head on this thumb and index fingers which are supported by his left arm. He desperately needs to find out the reason why Yunho has been out of space. He knows that it is affecting Yunho's studies and life, and more importantly, it is affecting him as well. He stood still thinking but nothing came to him. He decided to get in the house first and maybe, just maybe something will come to him when the time is right. He knocked on the door in front of him.

"It’s you? Why are you still here?" Yunho asked while narrowing down one of his eyes.

"Oh I just remembered that my sister is holding some party at home today. She said that i can’t be back before it ends and I got nowhere to go. So I thought I can stall for time at your place. But it’s okay if you mind. Cause I totally understand it you know." the whole while Jae was fidgeting around with his hands in his jean's pocket.

"It’s alright. Come on in" Yunho said and turned his head around, walking into his apartment while leaving the door ajar for Jae. Jae took a step in and sighed. "Step 1 completed" he thought to himself. Now he just needs to stay normal and get comfortable so that it will not arise any suspicion.

“Remember to close the door. I will go get a drink for you. Get comfortable.” Yunho said with his back still facing Jae while heading towards the kitchen. Although they have been friends for a long time, it was actually first time that Jae had step into the house after what happened 4 years ago. After since that accident had happen, Yunho did not allow anyone to enter this apartment. Jae didn’t know the underlying reason and he respected the fact that Yunho needed his space alone since his only kin has passed away. He lived with his granny since young. Yunho had never once mentioned anything in regards to his parents to Jae since he did not find the need to and his memories of them are vague. There weren’t any major changes to his apartment, the tables and cupboards are still at the same position, the pictures of Yunho and his granny are still there on the counter-top. Jae took one of the photo frame closer to him, it was when Yunho entered the school that he is attending now. Both of them have bright smiles plastered on their faces. It was a long time since I’ve since Yunho smiling like this. Jae sighed to his thought when Yunho called for him.

“Your drink is on the table.”

“Okay thanks. What are you doing now?”

“Nothing much. Just laying down and listening to some music.”

“Carry on with what you are doing then. I will just read my book.”

“alright.” Yunho lay down on his mattress (ondol) and plucked in his earphones. He shifted towards his left so that there is enough space for Jae on his right. He patted his hand on his right to signal jae to fill up the empty spot beside him. Jae grabbed his book from his bag and took a sit beside Yunho. He opened his book to the first unread page and glance over to the body beside him; the body that belonged to someone who is dearly precious to him. But this person was no longer the person that he knew. The person that used to be optimistic and energetic wasn’t there anymore; it was filled with sadness and grieves. Now this person is only a capsule without a toy in it, a pill without the medical content in it, a camera with a battery or film in it, a body without a happy heart in it. Jae wanted to put the toy in, fill the medical content in, replace the battery and film in and most of all, and bring the happiness in. He knew he had to do something. Soon, his head felt heavy and he needed to lie down so that the heaviness will go away. He covered his face with the book over him as he slowly relaxes his mind. His mind is filled with memories that he had spent with Yunho, the past Yunho. They are playing by itself, skipping from scenes to scenes where they both had shared quality time together. But the streaming of the scenes were paused as if there was a lost of connection when Jae felt warmth on his stomach. He lifted his book slightly up, with the edge of the book still touching his forehead. His eyes were shot wide open when he discovered that the warmth was emitting from Yunho’s left arm. He titled his head slightly to his left to notice that yunho’s face is actually inches away from him. He must be asleep now. Jae brushed Yunho’s fringe that was covering his eyes. He craved for the smile to be plastered on the face right in front of him. He leaned in and kissed Yunho’s forehead. Yunho moved closer to Jae’s body, towards the warmth. Jae was delighted that he can share this special moment with Yunho, but he was more elated to see that he was fast asleep. Let me be your sleeping pill. You will not die for consuming me, but I will die if you continue being how you are now. I want you to heal from the pain and grieves that you are holding on now. Throw them away or pass them to me. I am more than willingly to accept it if it will exchange happiness for you, Yunho. With that, he kissed his forehead again and lowered his book so that it will cover the fact that he is tearing up.

In the mind of Yunho:

My mind is relaxed. I guess I am asleep now, finally. A smile formed on my lips as I felt lighter. Something on my left felt comfortable and it drawn me in. I want to know what that is. I moved closer to the source of the comfort and I was right, it was warmth and I felt something else. I do not know how to explain this but the feeling of it makes me happy and relaxing. I love this moment right now, here. Everything is bright and warm. Just then, I hear a steady beating soon. It was a smooth rhythm and it seems like my heartbeat has sync together with the rhythm. It was peaceful and clear. I hope this is going no-where; because I want it to be always now-here.

notes: okay guys. how is it? tell me how u feel! cos i got a idea of a one-shot. hehehe

Discover (1/2)

the school bell rang and one by one, the students returned to their seats before the Business Management tutor begin his lesson. i do not know why i am here. i have little interest in Business, the very least actually. my father had always encourage (force) me to pick up some business skills since he will handling his shop to me one day. i am dead serious about this issue. i have no say in that matter, mother would always side father in this and when i stomp off to my room, she would knock on my door and reassure that what my father's planning for me is for the best of me. and after that, she will list down her expectations of me, to be a top business student with straight As in all my modules and the route she would want me to pick up. we have been through this so many times that i can recite it fast-forwarded or maybe turn it into a rap. however, im not really talented in rapping, im more inclined towards vocals and singing. just when i was getting into the grove of rapping, one of my classamate walked in. we were 15minutes into the lesson and he seemed not worried about his lateness.

"jung yunho, dont u think you should give the least respect for me? cant u try to be early for my lessons for at least one time? huh, just one time?!" Mr Kim looked up from his laptop that he was showing on the visualizer and eyed on Yunho.

"my apologies. i will try." he kept his sentences short. it felt as though he didnt want to talk to mr. kim any further.

"you! are u showing any form of disrespect for the teachers in this school? i have heard that u are always late for lessons and why is that so!?"

"nothing. just late." again, he kept this replies short. everybody's attention was on the tension. Mr kim looked at him and saw the latter coming towards my direction. i remove my bag from the chair beside mine and he filled in the empty seat. i could see the blood veins from the side of Mr Kim's eye. even a blind person could tell he is going to explode any time soon.

"mr kim, should we just start the lesson? please?" i pleaded. i do not want any unnecessary attention to be on Yunho again. i used my tender voice, hoping that it will smooth out the anger that is boiling up in Mr Kim. i think he realize he is garnering too much attention and it would be best if he just drop the case and continue with lesson.

"okay Jaejoong. i will not hinder any one of your studies. please pay attention to what i will be going through. it will be tested during the mid-semester week."

i turned my head to face Yunho. he just sat there staring onto nothing. i nudged him.

"hey. are u okay? reason that cant be told again?" i questioned him again although i think i will get the same answer again.

"oh, yeah. nothing much"

"i see. okay then." i replied and turned my head to face the screen. although my eyes are on the screen, my mind isn't. why is yunho always late for the first lesson? yunho has always been the laid-back and quiet person. we have been friends since we were 10; we were neighbour back then. i thought we have come into terms where no secrets are kept between one another but i guess, it was otherwise. we have this special friendship where no communication is required. when you know this person for 10 years, automatically you get to understand his habits, likings and personality, whether you want or not. it is only this bit of him that i do not understand, his lateness for every morning lesson. this is a bad thing as our grades are inclusive of our attendance and i definitely do not want that to pull down his grades where they are not great to begin with. i eyed over the corner of my eyes to check what he is doing, and again he is just staring into space. i sighed and returned my attention to Mr Kim.

the bell rang again. streams of students flooded the corridoor as they rushed to the nearest eartry for some snacks and treats. i stayed behind and accompanied yunho,i know he needs it.

"hey, want some thing light? i can get it for you."

"nah, its okay. im fine."

"did you hear what Mr kim said? the test is going to cover 10 weeks' lesson and i doubt a week study break is enough. dont u think so?"

"yes. i think so too."

i always attempt to lengthen my sentence in hope that the replies from yunho would correspond. it always fail but i am not giving up, not just yet.

"so which module are you starting first? the one you cant manage well or the one you are confident of?"

"i dunno?"

silence filled the air as i do not know what how to respond to Yunho's short replies. i stared hard at the latter.

"yun, are you getting enough sleep lately? it seems like your eye bags have gotten darker."

"i.. guess so?"

even since i got to know Yunho, there is always dark circles on his handsome face. i wondered why but did not question as i knew, the question will be avoided with short replies.

"did you use the eye cream that i got you the other time? i think is it rather useful for me so i thought it might be useful to you as well." once again, i spoke with clear concern in my sentence. concern which was beyond friends.

"i was lazy."

"YAH! do you know how much i spend on it?! how can you not use it and let it rot at some corner of your room?!"

"i will try it tonight."

"thats better." before i would continue their conversation, the Business Accounting tutor walked in the classroom with a stack of A4 size paper. the tutor place his teaching materials down on the tutor's table and wrote on the white board. -POP QUIZ-

the whole class showed their disagreement and displeasure of the pop quiz but the tutor ignored it and passed on the papers for everyone.

"i have warned you just last week to be prepared for one. those who heed for words will definitely have an advantage. you have one hour to complete this and your time starts now."

i glance over to yunho; he was staring at the papers and holding a black ball point pen on his right hand. i nudged him so that he would come to his senses and begin writing this answers. his body jumped a little by my action and he looked over. i pointed my index finger to the paper infront of him and signal him to start writing. he nodded his head and begin to write his particulars on the paper. i turned my head to face my own paper and started to fill up the blanks with the knowledge i'm taught. it was a rather easy paper for me, i thought.

-

the bell rang and it marked the end of today. i shove my backpack across my shoulders and turn to my right, Yunho is sleeping, again. he is always restless and tired whenever i see him. i sighed and poked him slightly.

"hey Yun, hey.. the class is over. hey.."

"huh. what?" Yunho replied grumpily as his precious sleep was disturbed.

“the class is over. Come on. I will walk you home.”

“ah. Okay.” He stood up, stretched his arms and took his sling bag. He headed towards the door while i hopped to catch up with his pace.

“how was the test? Was it manageable for you?” we were walking down the buzzing street of KimJung Avenue. It was across his apartment, KiShinBang Dong.

“yes. Lets hang out here.”

“why? I thought you were feeling tired just now during lesson.”

“not anymore. Lets walk.”

“alright. That reminds me, i need to buy socks for my sisters. They keep losing them! I don’t know why.”

“Cause you have too many sisters Jae.”

“i know right! But i manage to survive well, just that, i’m a bit feminine. Don’t you think?”

“you are, but im comfortable with that.”

“i know you wouldn’t mind. In fact, i think you liked it!” i playfully smacked/punched Yunho’s shoulder. Yunho lips break into a small smile.

“yes yes. Socks are that way.” He pointed his index finger down the street. I can see that he is loosening up each minute.

we reached the street stall selling all sorts of socks; high or low cut, thick or thin, colourful or plain, cartooned or popstars.

“How many pairs do you think i should buy, Yun?” Yunho faked a pondering face and replied, “8 pairs? 1 for each?”

“i thought so too. help me pick some of them. Why am i doing all these when it is supposed to be a lady’s job. Gosh!”

“cause you are a good brother and you love them.”

“i do...” my thought faded off, and to you too.

After we have finished selecting the sock, we headed down to the nearest coffee house and brought coffees to enjoy the crowd rushing home to their families.

*POV changed*

“can i have a Caramel Frappe and a Green Tea Latte please.” Yunho placed his orders while Jaejoong was busying twittering on his blackberry.

“sure. One minute please.”

They waited patiently at the counter for their drinks. This coffeehouse was one of the quietest and cosy one out on the streets. It became one of their favourite hang-out places after school and they always had their usuals, the ones that Yunho had ordered.

“sir, your drinks are done. Thank you for waiting and enjoy your drink.”

“thanks” Yunho mumbled to the staff and head off to their usual table. The table was situated near the glass panel that over sees the busy street. It was a perfect place to people watch and get lost in thoughts. Jaejoong followed closely behind Yunho, eyes still on his BB. Yunho took this seat and placed down their drinks; Caramel Frappe for Jaejoong and Green Tea Latte for himself.

“you should create a twitter account for yourself. It’s so much fun!” Jaejoong spoke, with his eyes still locked on his BB.

“i am lazy to create one.”

“how about me creating one for you. It’s easy.” Suddenly, Jaejoong burst out laughing, “you should totally see what Junsu tweeted to Yoochun! He wished that Chun was a girl!” Jaejoong continued to laugh by himself. yunho just sat there, staring what was beyond the huge window pane. he was tired. but, he just cant to fall asleep. this has been hunting him for years and it is slowly draining his remaining energy away. he is suffering from long-term insomnia. it happened to him when his granny passed away 4years ago. he was very close to his granny that her death became a huge blow for him. after since then, his sleeping habit was disturbed and it got worse day by day. for everyday, he could not fall asleep till 7am but his school starts at 9am. he did not want to disappoint his granny last wish which was for him to enter a prestigious college. in order to achieve that goal, he will and must attend school by all means including having his precious sleep taken away. he did not let any one know his illness, including his best friend who is sitting right in front of him. he sighed and continue to stare out the window, in hope that the hurried footsteps of the traffic will bring him into sleepy-land. on the other side, Jae acted like he was busy on this BB but he wasn't. he was observing yunho's every movement as he is puzzled as to why yunho seems more lethargic day by day. he is determined to find out why. before the both of them knew, it was time for dinner.

"hey, its already 7pm. i need to be home for dinner." Jae lied while he shuffed his phone into his bag.

"okay. lets go" both of him finished their drink and headed out. Jae insisted in sending yunho back as he planned something. he reasoned to yunho that the cafe was near his place so it is convenient for Jae to send him back. when both of them reached yunho's house door, yunho stepped in and bid his goodbye. Jae reminded still, plotting a plan within his mind.

TBC.

author's notes: how how how was it? it the response is good, i will continue. hahahaha

Episode 10 – Two sides

Taeyeon is following blindly. Ahead of her are 2 of her new friends, Sunny and Sooyoung. Apart from their height difference, they can actually hit off really well. Eventually, her footsteps brought her into the kitchen. It was actually Taeyeon's first time in the kitchen. She was too occupied playing with Stephanie at the backyard all the times. Furthermore, a kid is not necessary in the kitchen where all the food items are prepared by the adults. All she needed to do is to wait patiently for lunch to be served at the dining area. She scanned the environment with her eyes; it was actually bigger and more spacious of what Taeyeon has thought of. The upper and lower cabinets are tainted by glossy brown paint with a white marble top. Taeyeon's head is just 5cm above the counter top. All the kitchen wares are well-kept and it gives the place a posh and elegant feel.

"Where are the gummies? I don’t see any."

"The teachers don’t just display sweets around the kitchen, Taeyeon. If they do, it will be havoc here. They are placed right up at the highest cabinet so we can’t reach it."

Sunny responded to Taeyeon's questions with her index finger pointing at the direction where the gummies are rested.

"Where is Mrs Park? I thought she is always in the kitchen preparing food and safe guarding the sweets and candies." Sooyoung looked around the room in search of the human figure.

"Maybe she is chatting with her boyfriend in the toilet while doing her business. I heard from Yuri just now that she’s suffering a stomach-ache. Now we need to concentrate before Mrs Park comes back." Sooyoung reminded Sunny while grabbing one of the nearby stool. She climbed on it and reached for the cabinet.

“No wonder there is a weird and awful smell here the moment I step in. God.” Sunny added while Sooyoung grabbed handful packs of gummies before landing on the ground. Sunny quickly place the stool back to where it was originally and gathered with the girls.

“Okay. 2 big packs for each of us. Should be enough for a week.” Sooyoung announced and when she was about to hand over 2 packs of gummies to Taeyeon, footsteps were heard near the corridor.

“Hide it quick!! Mrs Park is back!””

Loss of ideas, Sooyoung quickly pull Taeyeon’s sweater forward and dump the packets of gummies in. Luckily, Taeyeon had tugged in her sweater which had prevented the gummies from falling out but it seemed like Taeyeon had a bloated tummy, like some middle-aged man. When Taeyeon was about to retaliate, a woman with her hair bun up walked into the kitchen.

“What are you girls doing here?” Mrs Park questioned the girls while looking down at them. She was a stern lady who strongly abides the rules. “What is wrong with your stomach, Taeyeon?” Taeyeon was dumbfounded and lost for words. It was her first encounter with this teacher and she was afraid that she could eat her up alive. She gives off an aura that frightens the children away and that is the reason why the children hardly come by the kitchen.

“Umm. Ummm” these are the only words Taeyeon is able to articulate. Her mind was shut down and she can’t think of any reasons to cover her act. She looks down at her foot with 2 of her toes clasped together.

“We were playing hide-and-seek, Mrs Park. I found Sooyoung first at the second level, then Yuri at the toilet. I covered all the places except here. So I was wondering if Taeyeon is here and here she is!” a few laughter escaped Sunny lips as she tried to cover up their act. The atmosphere remains quiet and intense as they wonder if Mrs Park will buy off Sunny explanation.

“Okay. I see. Next time when hiding, don’t come into the kitchen. I don’t want to clean up a messy kitchen. Off you go girls, to the common room.” Mrs Park gathered the girls out by extending both her hands and ushering them out. “Now, go play at somewhere else.” While finishing her sentence, a small sound was heard followed by an unpleasant smell. They all are fully aware of what it is and they giggled at the thought of it before launching off towards the common room.

___

“I am sorry about what happened just now, Jessica.”

Stephanie was awarded with a cold glare from Jessica together with a “humph” and folded arms.

“awww come on. It wasn’t on purpose.”

“Sorry no cure.”

“Will there be cure with ice creams? Daddy brought some yesterday. Or some gummies?”

Jessica softens her glare at Stephanie and tilted her head towards the short hair girl.

“If there is enough, I will forgive you.”

“It’s as big as a big huge mountain!”

“Make sure it is.” Stephanie held on to Jessica’s hand before pulling her towards the kitchen.

“Would popsicles do the cure?” Stephanie asked, standing on a stool to reach the level of the freezer while ransacking for ice creams.

“I want vanilla flavoured!” Jessica is attempting to peek at the contents inside the freezer while hopping up and down.

“Okay. Got that.” Stephanie came down from the stool; handed over the vanilla flavoured popsicle to Jessica while she unwrapped her chocolate flavoured popsicle. Both of them positioned themselves comfortably on the couch while enjoying the coldness of the popsicle.

“Hey Stephanie, try biting it. It’s more delicious that way.”

“Really? Okay I will try.” When her teeth were in contact with the popsicle, the icing sensation was refreshing for Stephanie. She enjoyed eating that way very much.

“ahhhh. It tasted better this way. It’s so yummy! Thanks a lot Jessica.”

“Nothing much. I thought you will like it as well.” Jessica took a bite off the popsicle as well but she pull off the popsicle so hard that her already lose front tooth came off. A high pitched scream echoed the room like a gunshot piercing through a silent room.

“What happened dear?” Simone came rushing into the room with her gardening tools dropped to the side before kneeling down to her daughter’s eye level. Jessica could not reply her mother because the pain was unbearable to her.

“Her tooth was pulled out while she was biting off the popsicle, Aunt Simone.” Stephanie replied, sounding a little concern, holding on to her melting popsicle with her right hand.

“Oh. That’s alright darlings.” She said to Stephanie before turning to her daughter, who is still sobbing very hard.

___

Year 1998

Both Stephanie and Taeyeon had found their newly-found playmates, but both of them did not forget about one another, just yet.

Taeyeon would always have mushrooms in her drawings regardless of the theme. She doesn’t mind if her drawing is out of theme, she just enjoy drawing mushrooms like she was 3 years ago.

The promise to fold blue stars was not forgotten by Stephanie, neither. She remembered to always make one when the date of 8 Marche is written on her class work.

By now, she already has 3 blue stars in a small glass bottle - The bottle she would pass to Taeyeon when they meet 15years later.

Episode 9 - New Beginning

Life in America was really hard to adapt, at least for Stephanie. She just lost her best friend and play mate, plus she was barely 7 years old for American age. Her father did not send her to any childcare centers now; instead, he had a different plan now.

“Steph, you will not be going to any childcare centers anymore.”

“Why daddy? I’m scare if I’m alone at home, all by myself!” Stephanie shouted back at her father.

“I want something new and changes. Since we are at a different place now, let’s try something new. You will like it.”

“What are the changes? No school?!” Stephanie added, sounding excited.

“You will still attend one as a 2^nd grader, just that no more childcare for you. You are growing up my little girl” he said with a pat on his daughter’s head.

“So what is it? Daddy has to work so”

“So someone will come by our house to take care of you.” Her father cut off her statement and continued.

“Who will it be?”

“She’s a nice lady. Plus, she also a Korean. “

“That’s cool daddy. But, I will have no one to play with.” Stephanie sounding a little dejected, she missed having Taeyeon by her side.

“Don’t you worry about that Steph, I will everything under my control and I bet you will like it.”

“But daddy,”

“No more buts Steph. Now it’s time you hit your bed. Come on.”

Stephanie groaned while being dragged up the stairs to her bedroom. Everything changed; her house got bigger (from a single to double story); her father became more gentle and caring and she got no one to play with.

“Sleep well alright Steph. Tomorrow morning will be great, trust me.” Her father brushed off strands of hairs off her face and kissed her forehead.

“Nights daddy.”

“Good night Steph.” He said while switching off the lights. Stephanie tucked into her blanket and closed her eyes. She wondered what will happen tomorrow and what her playmate is doing right now. Slowly and surely, she drifted off to her dreamland.

…

“Taetae?”

Stephanie was on a beach, the same beach that Taeyeon and she were before. The cloud was clear and dreamy. The beach was quiet; the wind was smooth and calming while the sea waves were soaring towards the coast. She saw an outline of a person, a petite and familiar one. She took tiny steps towards it; she was filled with curiosity and fear. She was curious of who that person was, but was feared why she is alone here at the same time. Both emotions build up slowly within her as she advanced faster towards the figure. It was as if the figure was asking her to follow it, and Stephanie did. Bit by bit, Stephanie found herself surrounded by palm trees, somewhere off the coast as the sounds from the soaring waves were minimal. She looked around her to find that figure again, she spin on the spot a few times before seeing her a few meters ahead. Carefully and cautiously, she walked towards it. The figure had her back facing Stephanie; she was wearing a jumper suit and had a tiny ponytail. Stephanie was narrowing her eyes to have a good look at the figure. The figure was about to turn her head towards Stephanie when the latter felt a tickle at the waist. She giggled and looked down. She regained her posture but the figure was gone. The tickling got fiercer and soon she was on the ground, giggling. She heard whispers, faint voices of “wake up”.

…

“Wake up!” another girl was attacking the sleeping body with continuous poking at her waist. The sleeping body was fidgeting on the bed, with her eyes closed. So the girl poked and shakes the sleeping body harder. Slowly, the sleeping body’s eye opened.

“AHHHHH!” Stephanie was awake now and she pushed the person who was a total stranger off her.

“WHO ARE YOU AND WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE!” Stephanie demanded an answer from the girl who was thrown off the bed.

“What was that for?” The push was not a hard one. It’s more like Stephanie brush the girl off the bed.

“This is my room and I don’t know you. That’s why!”

“I am going to tell mummy!” the girl stood up and brush off any invisible dirty on her before dashing her way out of the room. Firstly, she got a weird dream and secondly, there is this weird girl. She made her way towards the bathroom to clean up but a voice caught her.

“Stephanie, you are awake?” Stephanie took a step back as she fixed her gaze at the woman before her. She was tall and slim, figures that seem to only appear in the television, she thought. The woman was wearing a red apron, approaching Stephanie step by step.

“Don’t be afraid. I’m Simone. I am taking care of you from today. Maybe your father mentioned something about it to you?” Stephanie stood still in the “thinking” pose; left arm crossed supporting the weight of her right arm with her right index and thumb on her lips. Daddy said he got everything under control and someone will be here today. So that must be her.

“Daddy did mention someone will be here today. So you are the one?”

“Yes I am.” Simone approached Stephanie and kneeled down so that they are of the same eye level. “It’s nice meeting you Stephanie” she patted the younger girl ‘crown and smiled.

Stephanie felt warm and slowly, her lips shaped into a smile.

“Mummy, she pushed me!” the girl from before broke the warm atmosphere as she nudged Simone’s sleeve with her left hand and pointing her index finger towards Stephanie.

“It’s okay, darling. She is your friend.” Simone tugged the girl closer to her and glanced over to Stephanie.

“Stephanie, meet your new friend, Jessica, my daughter.”

Episode 8 - New Friends

Taeyeon was sitting alone at the table drawing and doodling on a piece of white paper. She’s drawing mushrooms and more mushrooms.

“Do love mushrooms that much?” Taeyeon dropped her crayons and turned back to the source of the voice. It was a petite girl with pony tails tied at the sides of her hair. She was wearing a dress and holding a Barbie doll in her hands.

“Well. I.. “

“I like mushrooms too. They are yummy.” The girl said and took a seat next to Taeyeon.

“They.. are.. “Taeyeon stumbled with her words as she was being asked about a typical regular mushroom, not the human mushroom she was thinking about.

“You must be new here. I haven’t seen you around since I left.”

“I’m not really new. I’m here for about half a year.

“Really? I’m away for half away because of my parents. They kind of took me off for a world tour.”

“That’s nice. How’s the rest of the world?”

“It’s really nice! There are so much food to eat and candies.”

“I love candies! Especially gummy bears!” Taeyeon exclaimed with excitement. The other girl laughed at the silliness of this girl.

“I’m Sunkyu but please call me Sunny.”

“Hi Sunny. I’m Taeyeon.”

“Want to go grab some candies?”

“How to? Ms Kim wouldn’t allow us, will she?”

“Don’t be silly, we can sneak around to get hold of them. One of my friends is really good at coming out with ideas like this.”

“Really? That’s so cool.”

“Wait till you meet her. Let’s go find her.” The two walked around the compound of Joan to look for Sunny’s friend; there was no sight of her at the first level.

“Let’s go up to the second level. She’s abnormally tall for her age. Try to look out for her.” Taeyeon followed the Sunny’s lead and started looking out for the tallest girl in Joan. Just then, she saw a shadow behind one of room’s curtains. The sunlight casted into the room brightly, revealing a tall and skinny silhouette.

“You don’t think she is there right?” Taeyeon whispered to Sunny’s ear, afraid of alarming their “prey” while pointing her index figure towards the huge windows.

“She must be hiding from someone or something. Com’on.”

Once again, Taeyeon tailed closely behind Sunny’s back, tall people are very scary for Taeyeon.

“YAH! CHOI SOO YOUNG!” the scream startled the hidden person behind the curtains. She lost her balance and fell forward. She crashed while pulling the curtain together with her. Even when she is on the ground, she was covered with curtains. Sunny lifted up the curtain to reveal a girl with a tiny face and shoulder-length hair.

“What’s that shout for LEE SUNKYU!? I’m not deaf just so you know.”

“What are you hiding from?” Sunny helped the taller girl out of the fallen curtain and attempted to hang back the curtain. She pulled over a nearby chair, stood on it and stretch her arms to their fullness, but it is not anywhere near the hooks.

“Are you being serious, Sunny? Given your height you think you can hang the curtains back?”

“Must you be so mean? I’m trying to help you here. “

“Or are you just feeling guilty? You made me fall after all.”

“I will never feel apologetic towards an evil.” Sooyoung scoffed at her comment and took the curtain from the latter’s grip.

“I will do it.” Sunny stepped down from the chair and Sooyoung got up and hang back the curtains. She doesn’t even have to extend her arms to the fullness to reach the hooks. She not only has long body length, but long arms too. Taeyeon stood still witnessing this whole scene.

“Oh, there another person here? You are too short for me to notice just now. I believe you should know my name with Sunny’s surprise scream just now?” she brushed her arms and knee caps while talking to Taeyeon.

“Yes. I have heard. I’m Taeyeon by the way.”

“Hi Taeyeon. Stop hanging around Sunny. Or you will just be like her, like her height. I haven’t seen you around. Were you new?”

“You asked the same question like me, giant. Were you away like me? Or I suppose you were in the kitchen busy wiping out the food supply the whole day to notice Taeyeon?”

“YAH! I did not.” Sooyoung voice trailed off at the last word. Taeyeon had to compress her laughter within herself at Sunny’s comment. She breathed hard and spoke up for Sooyoung.

“I was always outside at the backyard. Maybe that is why Sooyoung didn’t see me, Sunny.” Suddenly Taeyeon mind was flooded with images of sand sculptures that Stephanie and she used to build. She was zoning out for that moment when Sunny snapped her figures in front of her face.

“Hey, HEY! Did this giant scare you? Don’t be afraid of her. She is only tall and nothing else.”

“Oh no. it’s not.” Taeyeon replied with a faint smile on her face.

“By the way, why are you two here? I was playing hide-and-seek with the Yuri. But in the end it’s you two who found me. I guess she gave up finding for me then.” Sooyoung exchanged glances between Sunny and Taeyeon while waiting for an answer.

“We need you in the plan. It is call “Get-the-gummies” plan. You should understand just by the name?”

“Yes. It’s so obvious. Why do you need me in your plan? Can’t you get any for yourself?

“Com’on Sooyoung, you know Ms Kim, she’s is like a terror to us. Plus, she wouldn’t even give us anything, more even candies or gummy bears.”

“And you want me to get into her black book?”

“Sooyoung, don’t act like you’ve never done it before when you’ve done it umpteen times.”

“Must you expose me in front of Taeyeon? She has had a good image of me until now. You totally ruin it!” Taeyeon was once again witnessing this whole scene as a third person. But when she heard Sooyoung comment, she thought otherwise. She had this feeling that Sooyoung was like a bully and loud, but she dare not voice her thoughts out, just in case she will evoke the bully.

“Oh please Sooyoung. We can share the gummies! You know, and I know you love gummies.

“That’s true. Now that you said that, I have a craving for some.”

“That’s the spirit! Let’s head down towards the kitchen!”